Shuttling Between Two Languages: A Case Study of Indonesians Writing Letters

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Shuttling Between Two Languages: A Case Study of Indonesians Writing Letters

In L1 and English

Susilo

Mulawarman University

Email: Olisusunmul@yahoo.com

 

 

Recent criticism on contrastive rhetoric for its reductionist, deterministic, prescriptive, and essentialist orientation (Leki, 1997; Spack, 1997; Zamel, 1997) has brought about new fashion which leads to the polarization of two views: “traditional rhetoric” and “new rhetoric”. The traditional view of rhetoric  reduced English rhetoric to normative patterns (Kachru, 1995, 1999) taken from the expectation of the native speaker, leading to the argument that differences in pragmatic or rhetorical expectations can bring serious barriers to effective written communication. Accordingly, some researchers who hold this view as ideological lenses in their interpretation (e.g. Kaplan 1980; Wahab, 1995; Hyland, 1996; Kamimura, 1996; Sulityaningsih, 1997; Ngadiman, 1998; Harjanto, 2001; Cahyono, 2001; Budiharso, 2001) assume that rhetorical deviations from such native speaker rhetorical norm are seen as signs of unproficiency or interference. On the contrary, the new rhetoric view argues that such rhetorical deviations from the normative should not be considered as signs of unproficiency or interference for the bi/multilingual writers, but rather as rhetorical choices that could become critical/alternate discourse. The reason behind this argument is the notion of hybrid nature of culture as a consequence of postmodern world (i.e. under the influence of postmodernist, poststructuralist, and post colonial – which are under the umbrella of the post-foundational critical thought), which brings about considerable interaction, borrowing, and fusion between cultures and communicative genres. Bi/multilingualism, according to this view, is the norm which makes identity more complex, fluid, and contradictory. In such situation, there is erosion of national boundaries, causing greater multilingualism, hybrid and fluidity in identity. This hybrid and fluid identity has gone to be considerable as the basis of contrastive texts analysis. Analyzing texts across languages, thus, is not only limited to linguistic framework, but also postmodern social, cultural and institutional contexts. Contrastive rhetoric, in this view, is meant shuttling and negotiating thought between different communities (e.g. Canagarajah, 2002; Kubota and Lehner, 2004; Jenkins, 2003; Canagarajah, 2006; Graddol, 2006). In the current study, I shed lighted on the thought patterns of the Indonesian-English bilingual writers, who shuttle between two languages when they are dealing with letter genre of writing, namely, personal letter. To ascertain the writers’ thought patterns, I focused on two important linguistic aspects (a) rhetorical organization, which means how the writers arrange their ideas in the letters, for instances, having three parts in arranging the letter body, i.e. introduction, body and closing; and (b) paragraph organization referring to two things, i.e. logical arrangement, – the order of the sentences depending on the purpose of the letters, and smooth flow, – how well one idea or sentence in the letters leads to another (this can be achieved through the use of sentence combining and transitions). The current study intended to ascertain the thought patterns as reflected in those linguistic aspects in English and Indonesian letters written by the same persons who are bilinguals. On the basis of what has been stated above, research questions were formulated as follows:

(1)          What are the rhetorical organizations of the letters written by Indonesians in their L1?

(2)          What are the rhetorical organizations of the letters written by Indonesians in English?

(3)          What is the coherence in the letters written by Indonesians in their L1?

(4)          What is the coherence in the letters written by Indonesians in English?

(5)          How do the Indonesians make negotiation strategies in shuttling between L1 and English when they are writing letters?

THOUGHT PATTERNS IN LETTER GENRE

With the extensive globalization of information and communication, writing in such genre as letters for readers from disparate language and cultural backgrounds is becoming a reality for more and more people. People probably write letters to friends, to families, to their teachers who write to them, or to their publishers. In these activities, they enjoy the opportunity to put down on paper their thoughts and feelings that may be awkward to express them over other media. Some ideas have been put to give adequate answers to the basic questions about letter. For instance, as either expressive or persuasive discourse (Kinneavy, 1980), letter is defined as a written or printed message put in an envelope sent by a person to another directly or via post (Guralnik, 1978; Hornby, et al. 1987). Although only one person – the writer – is involved in writing the letter, in fact, however, a form of dialogue is still used in the letter communication. Therefore, Baugh (1998) emphasized on recipient-based rather than simply on writer-based in making the letter. Furthermore, Bly (2004) who preferred using the term “correspondence” to using the term “letter writing” emphasized on the state of letter writing in the era of internet. Moreover, Bly (2004) stated “the internet has revolutionized the speed at which we communicate, and the ease of getting your message into the hands of other people. But it hasn’t – at least not yet – dramatically altered the English language” (p. xv).

In regard with how letter is classified, there has been no exact agreement among the theorists of correspondence, which brings about unclear division of letters into business letters and personal letters as well as formal and informal ones. For example, Bly (2004) makes three distinctions in regard with how people make correspondence, i.e. 1) personal correspondence, 2) career and employment correspondence, and 3) general business correspondence. Using different terminologies, Baugh (1998) similarly divides the correspondence into three, i.e. 1) personal correspondence, 2) employment letter, and 3) consumer action letter. Apparently, these two divisions of correspondence rely on the same basic criteria, i.e.1) the subject/topic of the letter, 2) audiences of the letter, and 3) purposes of the letter. Personal correspondence which is basically aimed to strengthen social bond between writers and readers tends to focus on needs, interest, desire, etc as the subject usually incorporated in the correspondence. General business correspondence (Bly, 2004), or consumer action letter (Baugh, 1998), which usually accommodates the subjects of product, document, reports, etc, has the main objective of keeping a relationship on a strictly professional between writers and readers. Meanwhile, career and employment (Bly, 2004) or employment letter (Baugh, 1998) which is defined as a personal correspondence to a potential employer, usually mailed with a copy of resume, may capsulate both business and personal subjects since it accommodates either personal as well as business matters. It implies that this kind of correspondence stands in between in the sense that it could be classified into either “business” or “personal”, if a clear distinction between “business” and “personal” letter is made. Moreover, Alexander (1981) proposes two divisions of letter, i.e. 1) business letters which are made on either business or social situation, incorporating subjects such as: inquiries, quotations, and offers; sales and changes in business; counter-proposals and concessions; dispatches, packing and transport; payment and reminders; and complaints, and 2) personal letters which are made in the social situation, covering  such subjects as appointment and travel arrangement; invitation, employment (including an application letter); and goodwill letters.

The consequence of the various manners of how to classify letters as mentioned above is the inconsistency of using components of the letters in general. There are some letter components which are interchangeably used in both business letters and personal letter as well as in both formal and informal letters. The followings are various divisions of letter components. Sopyan (1999) mentions eleven components that a letter generally has, i.e. letterhead or heading (personal letterhead or business letterhead), date, reference, inside address, attention line, greeting or salutation, subject heading, body of the letter, complementary, signature, and additional information. Baugh (1998) uses different terms for some of Sopyan’s (1999) letter components and, furthermore, two components are combined into one term in these divisions. For instance, inside address and subject heading (Sopyan’s terms) are incorporated in heading and inside address (Baugh’s term); letterhead/heading in Sopyan’s term is labeled as personalized letterhead in Baugh’s term, while additional information in Sopyan’s term is equivalent to enclosure, copies, postscript in Baugh’s term. In addition, there are terms used by Sopyan (1999) which are included in Baugh’s (1998) terms, for example: attention line, and reference. Even, Alexander (1981) simply mentions four components which become the fabric of letters of various types, i.e. 1) the salutation, 2) the body, 3) the subscription, and 4) the postscript. Unlike the two divisions stated above, Bly (2004) does not explicitly give the division of letter components since he introduces a new kind of letter which has totally different components, i.e. email correspondence. He mentions seven parts as structural components of email letter, i.e. the “from” line, distribution list (CC and BCC), subject line, message area, salutation and closes, signature line, and attach files. Obviously, the fact that various terms of letter components are interchangeably used by the letter theorists above is as a result of different types of letters they referred to.

 

 

 

 

 

Diagram 1: The Layout of the letter according to different versions

Regardless the various classification of the letter, idea organization in letter genre is consistently put in the body of the letter. The body part sets easily into tripartite structure which is traditionally used to describe instances of planned, written communication, that is to say, in the body of a letter resides an introduction, a body, and a closing, even though certain letters sometimes incorporate this structure in a single paragraph (Bouton, 1995). Moreover, Baugh (1998) uses different terms in showing the tripartite structure, i.e. opening paragraphs, middle paragraphs, and brief paragraphs. In a bit different way, Gartside (1992) splits the structure into four as what he calls “four-point framework”, i.e. opening or introduction, middle section or details, future action or response, and closing section. In his perception, Bouton’s (1995) closing or Baugh’s (1998) brief paragraph should be split further into future action and closing section. Future action states the response required from the recipients while closing section describes what the writer is required to end the letter. These two points of talks, according to Bouton’s (1995) as well as Baugh (1998), in fact, belong to the same part, i.e. the closing.

Despite the various terms used to split body part of the letter, there is an agreement among the letter theorists, telling similar concept of what resides in each part of the body. The first are opening paragraphs where the writer begins the letter with the first words, whose primary function is simply to provide a backdrop against which to interpret the rest of the letter. It is to establish the purpose of the letter, which contains important initial information that the writer wants to present. Secondly, middle paragraphs intend to be longer than either the introduction or the closing, the ideas of which are more thoroughly developed. They are supporting, explaining, or elaborating the writer’s main point/s. The last is closing paragraphs functioned as the summarizing words to one or more points that had been made earlier. In his part, the writer let the reader understand what action or response to make or what important information is emphasized.

Rhetoric is an extra-linguistic aspect, the aspect which, according to Kaplan (1980), is also concerned with in the manifestation of the interrelationship between language and thought. Accordingly, in a directly similar way ideas do not fit together from language to language. Perceiving the same subjects by different speakers of languages such as English, Americans, and Indonesians would be different in terms of arranging their ideas. This is due to the fact that their cultures have their own special pattern of thinking and preference or taste in organizing ideas. One’s way of thinking largely determines their mode of discourse, their speaking or writing, and, their idea-arrangement (Kaplan, 1980). I called this way of thinking “thought pattern”.

Thought pattern in letter genre is seemingly reflected in the letter’s body (i.e. opening, middle, and closing paragraphs), where a writer of letter generates flow of his/her ideas or topic map, rather than other components of the letter which are subject to letter type and format change. Thought pattern in this scope is in line with the convention of English composition that similarly requires three main clusters of ideas to build up a good essay, i.e. the introduction, the body, and the conclusion (see Sullivan, 1976; Oshima and Hogue, 1983; Irmscher, 1983; Baugh, 1997; Smalley & Ruetten, 2001; and Wilbers, 2007). A paragraph is the basic unit of a composition in which a group of related sentences develop one main idea. A paragraph has two major structural parts: topic sentence and supporting sentences. The topic sentence contains the main idea of the paragraph, and consists of the topic of the paragraph and the limiting statement that limits and supports the topic. Supporting sentences support and develop the topic sentence. They explain the topic sentence by giving reasons, examples, facts, statistics, etc. On the other hand, the limiting statements restrict the discussion so that it focuses on the topic (see Sullivan, 1976). In addition, there is no handy list of rules for making decisions about where one paragraph should end and another should begin. The decision about where to end a paragraph will depend upon the types of writing; for example, newspaper uses a much shorter paragraph than do most college essays (see Gere, 1992). To determine paragraphs in the letter genre, in the current study, I use the classification of paragraph both as physical and conceptual paragraphs. When a paragraph is marked by spacing or indentation during the course of writing to show that a new idea come up, it is called the physical paragraph. This paragraph could be set off for many purposes and could be of any length. It is always a part of a longer piece of writing. When a writer’s constructs limits to one single idea, i.e. one topic sentence plus supporting details in a paragraph, then it is called the conceptual one. The sentences within such a paragraph rhetorically hang together and present generalization and complex information. Within this context they form the basic unit of discourse and are often made up into more than one physical paragraph.

PREVIOUS RESEARCH FINDINGS ON CONTRASTIVE RHETORIC OF INDONESIAN CONTEXT

Studies on rhetoric, especially contrastive rhetoric, have flourished since Kaplan (1980) conducted the research revealing that there are four different thought patterns behind different cultural backgrounds in the world, i.e. Anglo-Saxon, Semitic, Oriental, and Franco-Italian. In that study, Kaplan explains that each of the four models of thought patterns has its own characteristics and followers, e.g. Anglo-Saxon model which is usually used by western people has typical characteristics of being linear; Semitic model used by Arabic people and Persians has the tendency to manifest excessive parallel constructions instead of coordination; Oriental model whose followers are Asian people often uses indirection style; and Franco-Italian model whose followers, including Spanish, is favor of excessive digressions instead of linear flow of thought.

Those four different thought developments of expressing ideas can be seen clearly in the following Figure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The above figure can be explained as follows. First, linear development of thought which is the characteristic of the Anglo-Saxon model begins a thesis statement which is then followed by a series of subdivisions of that thesis statement. Each of the subdivision is supported by examples and illustrations. This proceeds to develop the central idea and relate that idea to all other ideas in the whole composition, and to employ that idea in its proper relationship with the other ideas. The final purpose is to prove something, or perhaps to argue about something. Secondly, the paragraph development of Semitic is characterized by a complex series of parallel construction, both positive and negative. Thirdly, indirection approach, according to Kaplan, marks the Oriental model. In this kind of writing, the development of the paragraph can be ‘turning and turning in a widening gyre’ The circles or gyres turn round the subject and show it from a variety of tangential views, but the subject is never looked at directly. The last, Franco-Italian model is characterized by the paragraph with full of digressions. In this model, the writer has much greater freedom to digress and introduce extraneous materials.

In adherence to Kaplan’s findings, various studies comparing L1 English texts and ESL Texts written by a group of students from different L1 backgrounds have been conducted. Using Indonesian context, in line with Kaplan’ study (1980), Wahab (1995) pioneered a preliminary study on the rhetoric of academic writing by Indonesian writers, examining argumentative and expository papers. He showed the findings that the Indonesian rhetoric thought patterns is in the process of change, shifting from circular patterns into linear patterns. As reflected in the paragraphs the Indonesian writers made, some types of paragraphs show the straight linear approach, some exemplify circular or spiral structure, and some other are neither linear nor circular. Emphasis of change is indicated by the use linear structure as a result of technology (e.g. in the utility of computer) that requires a tendency to use direct thought patterns rather than indirect thought ones.

In the development that follows, more Indonesian scholars have made researches on EFL rhetoric using Indonesian contexts. Sulistyaningsih (1997), for example, investigating rhetoric in expository essays of the fourth-year students of Indonesian College majoring in English revealed that of 64 % of the 11 introductory paragraphs written by the subjects have good thesis statements, while the other 36 % contained partial thesis statements. In terms of writing the developmental paragraphs, the subjects produced 32 paragraphs, 88% of which have good topic sentences, and only 78 % of those topic sentences reflect the ideas stated in the thesis statement. Regarding the concluding paragraphs, 82 % of the 11 paragraphs produced by the subjects met the requirements of a good concluding paragraph. Other studies investigating rhetorical structures of English essays written by Indonesian learners of English are those conducted by Harjanto (1999) and Budiharso (2001). These studies use English writing convention as norms of their analysis. According to Harjanto’s findings (1999), the rhetorical structures of essays written by students of the English department of the Graduate School of the State University of Malang reflected the overall features of the academic-writing essays. In these findings it is stated that the rhetorical development of ideas in the essays did not entirely follow the linear staging of the information as expected by the English-speaking readers. Furthermore, Budiharso (2001), in his attempt of investigating the contrastive rhetoric and linguistic features of the Indonesian and English essays written by Indonesian undergraduate students found that EFL undergraduate students devoted similar rhetoric and linguistic features in English and Indonesian essays. The similarity was shared in the linearity and non-linearity of ideas, development of ideas, coherence, and sentence complexity. In addition, Cahyono (2001) examining the effects of English learning development on the EFL students’ rhetoric in writing Indonesian persuasive essays found out, among other things, that the EFL students’ English learning development was likely to affect their rhetoric in writing Indonesian essays.

The above studies put Anglo-Saxon thought pattern (i.e. the convention of English writing) as a norm of their analysis so that it is implied that deviation from this linear thought are considered as negative interference among bi/multilingual writers. In contrast, I am of the opinion that Indonesian learners of English do not have to substitute Anglo-Saxon thought patterns (i.e. rhetoric of English paragraphs) for Indonesian learners’ own style of writing (i.e. oriental thought patterns), but I think it is necessary for Indonesian learners of English to master the rhetoric of English composition under the circumstances that English is a means to an end but it is not an end itself. In this case contrastive rhetoric knowledge provides the learners with a varied repertoire of rhetorical strategies instead of substituting the writing style of their L1 (see Connor, 2005).

The current study, therefore, focuses on the writers’ versatility and on changing the context of communication, thus treating the writers as agentive, shuttling creatively between discourses to achieve their communicative objectives.

NEGOTIATION MODEL: MOVEMENT BETWEEN TEXTS

Negotiation Model is a model which has recently been developed by Canagarajah (2006). This model is presented to change the traditional approach which has been dominated by monolingualist assumptions in conceptualizing second language writing with bi/multilingual learners. In this model, the proponent called for at least three important perspectives in regard with the concepts of studying bi/multilingual writing. The first perspective views bi/multilingual writing not in a static manner, but more on the movement of the writer between languages; secondly, since writing is not only the product for descriptions of writing competence, but also the process of composing in multiple languages, analyzing the text focusing more on the writers’ versatility and on changing the context of communication is an important point to be noted. Third, this perspective asserts that the writers should be treated as agentive, who would shuttle creatively between discourses to achieve their communicative objectives (see Canagarajah, 2006). The model can be presented as the following diagram:

L1L2

 

 

 

Diagram 2: Negotiation Model (Canagarajah, 2006: 590)

Adopting this model as my theoretical framework, I employ these three perspectives to do my analysis in the current study. First, I look at the bilingual writing in a more dynamic manner in the sense that I observe the movements of the writers (i.e. the participants) between L1 (i.e. Indonesian) and FL (i.e. English) when they are writing letters in both their L1 and FL. Secondly, I argue that the writers of the letters in this study are in the process of composing in more than one languages since they bilingual persons; therefore the analysis was subject to changing context of communication performed by the writers to either English-native and/or Indonesian-native interlocutors. Finally, I view the participants as agents, who are shuttling creatively between discourses to achieve their communicative objectives.

METHOD

Participants

An exploratory study was conducted prior to the main study for the purpose of establishing the criteria for selecting and/or seeking the participants. There were two phases of exploratory study. In the first phase, I explored the criteria of selecting the participants by having theoretical explorations on the construct of an adequate English-proficient individual, and by developing a questionnaire to obtain the information whether the participants have preference in correspondence. While in the second one, I selected the participants on the basis of the criteria obtained from the first phase. The criteria obtained were the followings: a) graduates of the English Department of a university, b) having passed the English Proficiency Test developed and administered by the researcher in the exploratory study, and d) showing preference in correspondence as reflected in the responses from the questionnaire in the exploratory study. Applying these criteria to the participant candidates, I obtained two selected participants from different educational and occupational backgrounds, as tabulated in the following table.

Table 1: Tabulation of the participants in the current study

No.    Subject	Sex	Age	Education	Status
1          YA	Female	32	Undergraduate Diploma	Lecturer at the English department
2          CL	Male	51	Graduate Diploma	Lecturer at the English department

Context

Two scholars participated in the current study. These participants have different social and educational backgrounds. The first participant (YA) was also a university teaching staff who had an experience to teach at the department of English in one of outstanding private universities in Indonesia for approximately 5 years and who had an experience of teaching Indonesian language to many different foreign students in her university. The second participant (CL) was a university teaching staff who had experienced to teach at the department of English in one of the state universities in Indonesia for more than 25 years, having M.A. degree from an Australian university and having an experience of teaching Indonesian language in many countries. At the time this research has been in progress, CL has been in his work of accomplishing his Ph.D. program.

Sampling

Analytic induction is used to collect and analyze the data as well as to develop a theory. Data are collected and analyzed to develop a descriptive model that encompasses all cases of the phenomena (Bogdan and Biklen, 1998: 63-64). That is why snowball sampling technique is used in this study. First, I picked the first few letters to analyze. Then, I picked another few letters to analyze, withholding the substantial theory I developed on the basis of my first analysis. After the second analysis I rewrote and modified the substantial theory to fit the new case. Next, I continued choosing and analyzing the new few letters, modifying the theory to fit the new case. I passed through these steps repeatedly until I stopped analyzing after I arrived at the point of saturation.

Procedures of Data Collection

Data were collected and analyzed to develop a descriptive model that encompassed all cases of the phenomena taken from the thought patterns as reflected in the participants’ letters of English as well as Indonesian which were collected in two ways: semi-authentic and authentic ways. First, semi-authentic elicitation was a technique in which my intervention as a researcher was involved in the process of data elicitation, that is to say the participants produced the data after they were stimulated to respond the letters under my initiation as well as a native speaker whom I worked with. The response-letters which were the Indonesian letters came from the correspondence between the participants and researcher (i.e. I myself); while the elicitation of the English letters was done by corresponding between the participants and the English native speaker. During the data elicitation I monitored this communication in the sense that I always ensured that they maintained communicating each other. The second elicitation procedure was the authentic way. This was a technique of data elicitation where the data were produced by the participants without my intervention. These data were the collections of participants’ letters (either in English or Indonesian), that were written either during the research time or before the research time. Besides, interview has been done to obtain data of the nature of the social interaction, the social roles and relationships of participants, the status and roles of the participants when writing their letters.

Analysis and Interpretation

The procedures of data analysis were in the following steps. First, after data were collected, I focused, simplified, abstracted and transformed the raw data to find out the thought patterns reflected in both English and Indonesian letters. I described the thought patterns reflected in those letters from the data sources (i.e. data reduction). The following step was a data display, where I showed the organized assembly of information taken from the data reduction. The last step was a conclusion, allowing me to draw the meaning of the findings, and generate substantial theories.

Moreover, in interpreting the data, I used Systemic-Functional Linguistics (SFL) approach in which the analysis of context is broken down into field, tenor, and mode. Field means what is happening, the nature of the social interaction taking place (what is it that the participants are engaged in, in which language figures as an essential component?). While tenor refers to who is taking part (the social roles and relationships the text and rhetorical patterns (Halliday, 1994). The thought patterns of letters were analyzed – mode level analysis-, then the findings on the thought patterns were matched up with the contexts of writing those letters (i.e. who the addressers were, who the recipients were, what was the relationships between them and under what circumstances the letters were written) – field and tenor level analysis – to ascertain how the writers shuttle between two languages. In addition, Canagarajah’s (2006) negotiation model also was as my approach in interpreting data. In this case, view of postmodern dominated my interpretation in the current study. In short, negotiation strategies of shuttling between two languages were in fact seen in mode level, however, field, and tenor level cannot be separated from the analysis as means of understanding contexts of situation.

FINDINGS

In order to keep the discussion in a manageable manner, I focus my analysis mainly on the existence of tripartite parts within the bodies, i.e. opening, middle, and closing paragraphs and whether the messages conveyed in the letters are well-organized. In addition, being well-organized in the letters in the current study refers to two aspects: logical arrangement and smooth flow. Logical arrangement refers to how the writers of the letters arrange their ideas in an orderly way to make them understandable (Smith, 1985). The smooth flow refers to how well one idea in the letters leads into another (Smalley, et al, 2001). In other words, meanwhile the former is about the order of sentences in the letters, the latter implies the transitional signals used to arrange those sentences. The logical arrangement was judged by examining whether or not the writers used order of space, order of time, order of size/importance, classification, process, structure, etc., depending to a great extent on modes of writing. The smooth flow was determined by examining what kind of transitional expressions and sentence combining that the writers used in the letters.

Since there are two participants under study, the descriptions of the findings are displayed per participant, focusing on how they write their tripartite parts of the letters, and the underlying contexts.

1. Participant  YA:

1. A. Tripartite Structure Development in the letters

In developing the introduction section, YA fulfills the Western conventions by making the opening paragraphs in line with that Anglo-Saxon way in both English and Indonesian letters. Opening paragraphs, according to Anglo-Saxon convention, is a part where the writer began the letter with the first words, whose primary function is simply to provide a backdrop against which to interpret the rest of the letter. This part is usually brief and clear, establishing the purpose of the letter, containing important initial information that the writer wants to present. In the following excerpts, obviously we can see how YA shows us her opening paragraphs which describes exactly what she achieves in the introductory sections.

In Excerpt YA-1, for instance, YA begins her letter with a question of her reader’s present condition which is expressed in a single paragraph consisting of four sentences. These four-sentence paragraph presents an initial talk which lets the reader’s attention alert of their next talking before he immediately switches the main topic in the discussion of politic issues that actually is intended to answer the previous letter asking about how is the political news in Indonesia.

Excerpt YA-1:

Opening

How is everything? It seems you enjoy your time, being at home again? You know there is a new native teacher at my Campus. His name is David from Canada. He said that his family is from States but moved to the US.

Middle

Political problems, huh? Still unsatisfying , I think. Lots of critics for the president have been emerging in daily newspapers. I heard complaints from the people in public transportation (while taking them to my work place), in a conversation I caught in food stalls or warung, and saying written in the street pamphlets… the prices..the justice..the poverty…sometimes I wonder where they lead this country to. I read an article in Asiaweek talking about whose to blame for all the happenings in Indonesia..Elite politicians in Jakarta? Well, I just keep my fingers crossed.

Closing

Best wishes.

This is YA’s answer to the questions in her email sent to reply her overseas friend’s previous email. YA considers this friend as online friend who she never meet. They are close friends in the sense that very often they make chat online. The contents of their letters mostly discuss current political issues in Indonesia.

In her Indonesian letters, YA writes excerpt YA-2 where we can find the typical opening of her Indonesian letter. YA develops a brief opening in which she congratulates the reader’s success and questions the showroom. This is an initial talk whose function is to break a hole of further conversation. Next, in a single paragraph, she continues to convey information about her two new overseas friends. She expresses her pride of having these friends to the reader who is an Indonesian friend.

Excerpt YA-2:

Opening

Haloo,

Wah, tambah sukses ya, bakulannya ? hehehe….Selamat deh. Boleh..Tapi…Showroom-nya di mana?

Middle

Terus, teman baru juga dapat dua: satu Bapak Belanda yang buaaaaiiiiik banget dan satu lagi Mas Swiss yang keren. Bapak Cornelis itu sudah sering ke Indonesia bahkan bisa bahasa Indonesia dan sedikit Jawa. Mas Rob seorang akuntan dan sangat tertarik untuk belajar bahasa Indonesia (aku Bantu dia dikit-dikit). Mungkin dia bakal ke sini dalam waktu dekat! Nah, Coba bingung nggak tuh? Siapa lagi kalau bukan Aku. Tapi senang juga kok punya teman banyak. Benar ya, ke Malang? Aku tunggu. Soale aku terus terang sibuk di “markas” nih. Banyak anak Jepang untuk belajar bahasa Indonesia.

Closing

Keep in Touch,

Xxxxx

 

English Translation:

[Hello

Congratulation for your successful business? Good! But may I know where your showroom is? (Opening section)

Well, I got two new friends: a nice old guy from Dutch and a good looking young guy from Switzerland. Do you still remember Mr. Cornelis? He often comes to Indonesia; even he can speak Indonesian and a little bit speak Javanese. About Rob, he is an accountant and is interested to learn to speak Indonesian (I tried to help him). He might come to Indonesia soon! Look, you must be wondering who handles all these guests! Me again, right! But don’t worry, I would be very pleased to have more friends. So, you have to visit Malang soon! I am waiting for you. You know, at present I have lots of works to do in my office. Many Japanese come to Indonesia for learning Indonesian language (Middle section)

Keep in touch, (closing section)

XXXX]

This letter (excerpt YA-2) actually intends to strengthen the social bond between close friends – both the writer and reader – who are Indonesian people. The contents are more asking about many people they know each other. Interpersonal relationship seems to be more important in this context of correspondence. A bit request, however, is inserted in this letter, i.e. a request to meet in Malang, a city where these two guys have ever been together.

In addition to the typical introduction sections as stated in excerpt YA-1 and YA-2 above, YA makes a different variation, i.e. writing the letters with no opening paragraph. This has been emerging in the case of writing both Indonesian and English letters. The typical letters of no opening are found both in the following excerpts. Excerpt YA-3, for instance, is the representative of typical letters with no opening. In this letter, YA starts writing by directly expressing what she intends to write, i.e. asking the prices of some books she mentions. Expressing thanks and asking another case which she should have put in the introduction section is in fact developed after the starting talk. Moreover, she ends up the letter without saying the closing remarks.

Excerpt YA-3:

Middle

Ada teman tanya nih, daftar harga dari buku-buku ini:

Superkids

Grogo lovers English

1000 + picture for teachers to copy

Communication Game Series

Teaching English to Children

High Five

O ya! Terima kasih karena sudah dikenalin samaaa…

Eh..Gimana Bali? Cerita dong? Soalnya aku sendiri sudah lama ngak ke rumahnya Bu Mimil. Sibuk dengan duniaku sendiri.

 

English Translation:

[A friend of mine asked the price list of these books:

Superkids

Grogo lovers English

1000 + picture for teachers to copy

Communication Game Series

Teaching English to Children

High Five

By the way, thanks for introducing me to someone…uh huh, how about Bali? What do you think it looks like? I have been long time not to visit bu Mimil. I have been busy with my business.]

Such a conversation-like letter is sent via email. That YA does not put her opening in her letter is due to the fact she was actually answering the previous email from her Indonesian close friend. In this letter resides important information as well as social chat. Asking about the price of the books is the informative message while the rest of the sentences are the social interactions which are not really the point.

The next example, Excerpt YA-4, illustrates the typical of no opening letters in English. The letter contains two paragraphs: one which is very long is the middle paragraph and the other one, i.e. the short one, is the closing remark. An analysis of the similarity of Christianity and Islam is the topic developed in the first paragraph, meanwhile asking the reader’s comments as to this topic is written as the closing of the letter.

Excerpt YA-4:

Midlle

I come from Islamic family, but I know Christianity well. You know, I would like to inform you that there is an important history of Islam and Christianity. Interestingly, I have just realized that Koran and the Old Testament of the Bible are from the same source. It was very clear to me we have the same God. My understanding is that Christianity and Islamic are from the ‘offspring’ of Abraham. This old man did not have any child at first, so he got ‘Ismael/Ismail’ from his Egyptian Maidservant –Hagar (2^nd wife that was never recognized). When his legal wife bore a son to him in his old age, she asked him to send away Hagar and Ismael when Isaac was born. Abraham was distressed but God promised to make the son of the Maidservant into a nation also, then they were sent away. As promised by God, Islamic was from the offspring of Ismael. Just like Jesus was from the offspring of Isaac. So, Muslim and Christian should be like brothers and sisters.

Closing

What is your view?

Similarly, this is a conversation-like letter corresponded by friends who are not too close, which is sent via email. The contents are a bit serious topics. This is also the answer of the previous letter so that it is not necessary for YA to put her opening in her letter. Obviously, it is imperative that important information become the message with no social interaction, therefore it is more transactional.

From these two examples (excerpt YA-3 and YA-4), peculiarity occurs not only in the openings of Indonesian letters, but also in those of English letters. YA is compelled to adopt different strategies of making introduction section because she has to make different content (i.e. field in Hallidayan term). In excerpt YA-3, YA is compelled to make short answers as soon as possible since she considers them as important questions which need immediate answers since they contain serious topics. This letter is more transactional communication rather than social interaction. In other words, the negotiation strategies YA made in these two examples are due to the field feature of context of situation according to Halliday (1994).

In writing their middle paragraphs, YA shows a couple of tendency, i.e. linear and centrifugal middle paragraphs. By definition, the linear middle paragraphs means parts of paragraphs of the letter that cover one thesis statements developed in one or two supporting paragraphs; or  parts in which several topic sentences are developed by several related supporting paragraphs, that is to say the middle part of the body in the letter which has more several topics. While the centrifugal middle paragraphs are those where the writers start their paragraphs with peripheral materials and get to their main ideas in the middle before they usually repeatedly state their supporting ideas before and after the main ideas, or the writers do not show their main idea until the end. In Western convention, the centrifugal one is said peculiarity.

Again, referring to the variations in the middle paragraphs of the letter, it is apparent that both English and Indonesian letters produced by YA show inconstant variations in the sense that both linear and centrifugal variations occur in either Indonesian or English letters. A typical of linear middle paragraphs in English letters is exemplified by excerpt YA-4. She addresses the history of the similarities in Islam and Christianity, i.e. the fact that both religions are originated from the same ancestors, the prophet Abraham. In this letter, she serves the principle of analogy in organizing her paragraph (see the middle part of excerpt YA-4). Obviously, in this letter YA makes a claim that the Bible and Koran have been from the same source (her thesis statement), which brings logical consequence of worshipping the same God for the Christianity and Muslim congregants. In addressing this source of similarity, YA elaborates the offspring of the prophet Abraham: Ismael and Issac. The rest of the sentences telling further elaboration of Ismael and Isaac serve as her supporting ideas.

Next, we can see how YA also employs her centrifugal middle paragraphs in her English letter, as exemplified by excerpt YA-5, as follows.

Quotation taken from Excerpt YA-5:

A big racial riot (killing, violence and burning) happened lately in Sampit, Kalimantan (Borneo island) that involved two different races: Dayak and Madurese, and then spreading to some parts there. My Dad is so worried because we are multiraces: Banjarese, Dayak and Palembang (Sumatera) descents who leave in Java where majority are Javanese and Madurese. There’s a possibility it will also spread in Java. A bit scary, huh? Till now my students who come from Kalimantan mostly haven’t return yet to Java, though the school will start next week. I can only pray and hope it’ll be over soon, back to normal again soon. Anyway, it’s dry season now here and I guess it’ll be very long hot one. Cicadas’ song is very beautiful. And the beauty of dusk sky is so…unspoken.

The content of this letter tells us what was happening in a racial riot between two ethnic groups in Kalimantan. YA starts her story by informing that there was a racial riot without making a claim as her thesis. She develops her paragraphs by giving only peripheral materials: information of racial riot, the feeling of her Dad, her expectation about what’s happening next, and the season in her town. Until at the end, her main idea has never been emerged. If we look at excerpt YA-4 and YA-5, both middle paragraphs are taken from the letter written in English, but why does YA make different strategies? This tells us that negotiation strategies YA made is not due to the language she uses. In the case of excerpt YA-4 and YA-5 above, the negotiation strategies are evidently because of the different nature of content of those letters (negotiation influenced by field). The contexts of letters in excerpt YA-4 and YA-5 are the same: readers are online friends whom she never met so the relationship between writer and reader is not too formal and not too casual; the letters are sent via email so they semi-oral correspondence; the contents are serious ones, so it is more transactional rather than interactional.

Another centrifugal middle paragraph can be found in excerpt YA-2. YA in this letter writes chat correspondence to her close friend whom she hasn’t met in a long time. If we see the content of this letter, apparently no serious topic has developed. There is even no important information message she wants to convey in fact but the interactional intention of correspondence. This brings a consequence of unstructured organization of the paragraph (see the middle part of excerpt YA-2). This letter is written under a certain context, i.e. YA maintains her communication with her old friend whom a long time she hasn’t met. They used to be close friends when they were studying in the English Department of a University. The content of this letter ensures the writer’s intention to maintain social bonds. This leads YA to insert her own voice in employing the strategy of making her middle paragraph. Therefore, negotiation in excerpt YA-2 is not only because of the content (field) but also because of the relationship between the writer and reader (tenor).

Pertaining to the presence of closing paragraphs in the letters, it is found that there is no different variation in both kinds of letters written by YA. Two variations are developed in both English and Indonesian letters, i.e. 1) brief closing paragraphs, and 2) conceptual closing paragraphs. YA constantly employs the Western conventions in developing her closing section of the letters. This quoted letter (Excerpt YA-6) exemplifies the letter which has brief closing paragraph in Indonesian letters. In this letter, YA in fact let her reader understand what action or response to make next, i.e. she ends her letter by addressing the short discourse expression “Udah dulu ya” which means that “that’s it”. Context of this letter is that: chat correspondence which talks about daily topics. The reader is her peer who needs help in a sentimental matter.

Excerpt YA-6:

Opening

Makasi ya emailnya.

Middle

Iya sih, kangen banget apalagi dengan masakan Mamak, tadi malam Mamak telpon udah masak enak-enak. Nggak tahu kalau di kos anaknya cumin makan indomie, hi..hi..hi. Beginilah anak kos!!

Tentang Riza, sempat juga aku ngomong kayak gitu kepada dia. Cemburu kali hehehehe, biarin aja ntar kapan-kapan aku kirimin surat atau email.

Closing

Udah dulu ya…

English Translation:

[Thanks for the email (opening)

That is right, I miss you so much, I miss Mom’s cooking. Last night she called me telling that she made my favorite meal. You know here I always have fried noodle for my meal, he.he.he. That’s a student’s life!

By the way, it is about Riza. I have talked such thing to her. She might be jealous, he.he.. That will be okay, I guess. Some day I will send her email or letter. (Middle)

Okay, that’s it. See you. (Closing)]

In addition, brief closing paragraph in English letters can be seen in the following quoted letter (i.e. Excerpt YA-7). The discourse expression “see you” is not a part complementary close, but it functioned as the closing paragraph of the letter’s body. In fact, the complementary close of this letter has been already expressed in the word “take care”.  The context indicates that the relationship between writer and reader is not so intimate. They are online friend who often make a chat. The topic is not too serious.

Excerpt YA-7:

Opening

Hello,

Meet me again. How was the result of going to Price Brothers’ office? It’s getting hot, dry and windy here in Malang. How’s the weather in your town, anyway?

Middle

I can imagine how everybody feels in Libya when they get the mail. Even in Malang, I feel it too when I receive email from far away friends. Anyway, your last letter has not come yet.

The political condition is still uncertain. Everybody wonders who will be the next president. The winner in the last election does not mean that she/he will be the next president because we still have next October summit conference which decides who will be the next president of Indonesia.

Closing

See you!

Take care,

XXXX

The quoted single-paragraph letter (i.e. Excerpt YA-8) which in fact contains tripartite structures exemplifies the letters which employ the conceptual closings. This letter is not marked by spacing or indentation during the course of writing to show which is the opening, middle, or closing part of the body. However, the ideas encapsulated in such a single paragraph in fact show divisions of those tripartite parts. Such expression as “please reply this letter” and “bye..I miss you” are in fact the closing remark, while the first sentence, i.e. “I read your letter yesterday” is the opening one. The reason for the former is that the writer produces words such as “please reply this letter” to let the reader understand what action or response to make; while for the latter, a sentence such as “I read your letter yesterday” in fact let the writer simply provide a backdrop against which to interpret the rest of the letter. It is to establish the purpose of the letter, that is to say, continuing to discuss or answering the content of the letter previously sent. The context indicates that the relationship between writer and reader is not so intimate. They are online friend who often make a chat. The topic is not too serious.

Excerpt YA-8:

I read your letter yesterday (Opening). Indonesia is just fine, especially in Malang, although the weather is very hot now. How about Canada? What is the season now? By the way, you know something? There is now a new Mall in Malang, Tidar Mall. I have never been there, but my friends said that it is quite good there. Are you really going to Malang? When? What is your plan to celebrate for the next Christmas and New Year? Are you going to celebrate them in Indonesia or in USA? My nephew is really missing you, and so do my family. They keep asking me when will you come to Malang (Middle). Please reply this letter. Bye.. I miss you.(Closing).

1. B. Idea Development in the letters

In terms of whether the messages conveyed in the letters are well-organized or ill-organized, I come to the next analysis by looking at how YA makes her messages organized in line with the writing convention of the Anglo-Saxon paragraph. Consequently, logical arrangement and smooth flow are used as the parameter of analysis. Whether or not these two aspects are employed in developing ideas conveyed in a paragraph, I think, will determine categorization of being well-organized or ill-organized paragraph in this analysis.

YA’s tendency to develop her ideas in either well-organized or ill-organized paragraphs in her letters occurs regardless of the language she used. Topics and her relationship to her readers are the influencing factors. Let us have a look at the following quoted examples. Despite some of her letters having well-organized paragraphs, some others are found to have ill-organized paragraphs. The quoted paragraph below is the example of this typical paragraph.

Excerpt YA-9:

…O ya! Terima kasih karena sudah dikenalin samaaa…

Eh..Gimana Bali? Cerita dong? Soalnya aku sendiri sudah lama ngak ke rumahnya Bu Mimil. Sibuk dengan duniaku sendiri..

 

English Translation:

[O yeah! Thanks for introducing me to someone…ehm, how was your trip to Bali? Why don’t you tell me about it? ‘Cause for a long time I haven’t visited Bu Mimil’s house.  I am very busy with my own business.]

In the quoted paragraph, YA shows her failure to develop the logical arrangement of ideas. She did not pay much attention to the principle of organization. Three different ideas were developed, i.e. expressing thanks, asking her friend’s trip to Bali, and Bu Mimil’s house. However, in this brief paragraph, she did not give enough supporting ideas for the three topics she tried to develop in her letter. She exactly failed to utilize certain kind of organization principle. In terms of showing the smooth flow, this paragraph lacked smoothly constructed sentences. It can be seen from the fact that the paragraph lacked some transitional signals and combining sentences. Only two transitional signals were used, i.e. eh…and soalnya.

Similar phenomena are also found typifying ill-organized paragraphs in English letters. The following quoted paragraph represents such typical paragraph.

Excerpt  YA-10:

Malang is quite hot these days though rain’s still fall once or twice. I think dry season is on the way. Talking about Paiton, I also contact by mail a friend, who previously worked for TEC and now works for EMOMI. May I know why you seem so eager to work in Indonesia or Asia again?

Apparently this paragraph lacks the logical arrangement. There are three ideas that YA should have developed in this paragraph: the weather of Malang, a cold town located some here in southern part of East Java, Paiton, a town located somewhere in eastern part of East Java, and the reason why the recipient is so eager to work in Indonesia. This single paragraph which incorporated three main ideas brings the consequence of the fact that it is difficult to assure what kind of organization principle the writer used.

The English letters showed exactly the same phenomena. This paragraph was typical of the well-organized one. YA addresses the history of the similarities in Islam and Christianity, i.e. the fact that both religions are originated from the same ancestors, the prophet Abraham. In this letter, she serves the principle of analogy in organizing her paragraph (see excerpt YA-4). In addition, several expressions and sentence combining were employed in the paragraph, which made the readers easily follow the ideas she expressed. For example, some expressions such as just like, but, when, so, were used, and sentence combining such as “When his legal wife bore a son to him in his old age, she asked him to send away Hagar and Ismael when Isaac was born” were at the same time available in the paragraph.

1. Participant  CL

2. A. Tripartite Structure Development in the Letters

What makes CL’s opening paragraphs in his both English an Indonesian letters significantly different from the previous participant’s (YA) is that the deviation CL often makes in some of his letters by presenting very long paragraphs as the opening remarks really systematizes certain variation of opening, though, other variations of his opening paragraphs remain in line with the convention of writing opening paragraphs in English rhetoric. The following quoted letter which was sent via mail to a person who had a higher social status than the writer but at the same time he was the writer’s younger relative, and was not written in the purpose of responding the previous letter exemplifies the deviation.

Excerpt CL-1:

Opening

Surat ini bersifat pribadi namun sedikit bernuansa resmi menyangkut wewenang Adik sebagai salah seorang pejabat tinggi di daerah kita. Mungkin adik telah mendengar bahwa saat ini saya sedang mengambil S3 bidang pendidikan Bahasa Inggris di Universitas Negeri Malang (UM), dulunya bernama IKIP Malang. Saya baru mulai dengan semester 1 dari minimal tujuh semester. Pendidikan S3 dibagi atas 2 tahap, yaitu tahap kuliah yang terdiri dari tatap muka, ujian komprehensif dan seminar proposal selama 3 semester pertama, dan tahap kedua non kuliah selama paling kurang 4 semester yang terdiri dari kegiatan penelitian, penulisan dan ujian akhir disertasi. Dulu mahasiswa calon doctor harus mengikuti apa yang namanya ujian promosi. Mahasiswa program doctor gaya lama biasanya takut menghadapi ujian promosi tersebut. Dan untuk mendapatkan kesempatan ujian saja bisa-bisa harus menunggu sama lamanya dengan masa belajar itu sendiri. Di dalam ujian seperti ini sering mahasiswa calon doctor dipermalukan habis-habisan oleh para penguji kalau kurang persiapan. Saya kira Adik mengetahui tentang ini dengan baik sekali. Untunglah mulai dari angkatan 2000 sudah tidak ada lagi ujian promosi doctor seperti itu lagi. Sekarang hanya ada ujian desertasi tertutup dan dihadiri oleh tim penguji dan yang diuji saja. Dan diharapkan mahasiswa program doctor bisa selesai lebih cepat, yaitu antara 3 – 3,5 tahun.

Translation:

[This is a little bit official letter since it much concerns with what you are going to authorize as an important government person in our region. Perhaps my brother has heard that I am now working for my Ph.D program in State University of Malang (UM), formerly IKIP Malang. This is my first of the seven semesters that I am supposed to accomplish. Students of Ph.D program are required to joint two phases of academic activities, i.e. the course activity, consisting of some courses, comprehensive seminar, and research proposal seminar, and the non-course activity, which is the time for working the dissertation. The candidates of Ph.D program used to prepare what the so-called “open comprehension exam”. In this exam, the candidates used to get nightmare since they were to be examined in front of the public audiences. Frequently the candidates were humiliated by the professors when they could not give adequate scientific arguments in replying their questions, comments, or critics. However, I am lucky that at present there is no such exam anymore. The Program substitutes the so-called “close comprehension exam” for the “open comprehension exam”. The substituting exam is held in a room where only the examiners and candidate are expected to be presence there. Consequently, the program is encouraging the students to finish their study in a relatively short time, i.e. three up to three and a half years).]

It was at end of this letter that CL explicitly states two requests as his intentions in writing the letter, namely, (1) for financial help and (2) for making his daughter passed in an entrance examination for a civil servant position, i.e. a state kindergarten teacher. This letter was written to his younger relative who was a governor in his region. CL does not directly state his points in the letter, however, he tells some stories about himself and his own condition at that time. This seems to be the way Asian people express ideas (i.e. oriental thought pattern in Kaplan’s term). He knows exactly who his audience is, leading him to write this quite long opening paragraphs in his letter. Now, let us see the continuation of this letter where, in fact, he adds more paragraphs in the opening before he ends his letter with closing paragraphs.

Continuation of Excerpt CL-1:

Opening

Angkatan saya hanya berjumlah 7 orang dan saya yang tertua. Karena sudah lama tidak pernah membaca buku-buku ilmiah atau sering menulis karya ilmiah, pada bulan pertama, saya mengalami sakit kepala hampir setiap hari. Karena setiap hari ada tugas membaca dan menulis makalah untuk dipresentasikan, maka pikiran dan tenaga saya benar-benar terkuras dan akhirnya memicu sakit kepala saya. Paramex adalah sahabat saya sehari-hari, dan selalu saya bawa kemanapun saya pergi. Bahkan baru-baru ini saya sempat diopname di rumah sakit Lavalette selama 3 hari karena sakit kepala yang berkepanjangan (selama 1 minggu). Di rumah sakit kepala saya di Scanning dan untunglah tidak terdapat apa-apa yang membahayakan seperti tumor atau kelainan lainnya.  Karena tidak pakai kartu askes maka saya membayar hampir satu juta. Yang paling mahal adalah scanning, harganya 650 ribu. Karena migren yang kronis tersebut, pernah saya mengalami suatu titik krisis dimana saya memutuskan untuk berhenti kuliah. Untunglah bahwa profesor-profesor saya selalu menjadi pemberi kekuatan dan semangat pada saya disaat-saat kritis itu. Sekarang saya menjalani pengobatan alternatif a.l. gabungan akupresur dengan totok jalan darah dengan shock listrik bertekanan rendah. Saya juga mulai doyan minum jamu. Dan tentu saja bukan jamu kuat lelaki. Ada perubahan yang cukup lumayan, dan tampaknya saya telah melewati masa kritis itu, walaupun sering masih megap-megap.

Saya tidak pernah merasa menyesal karena mengambil S3 di dalam negeri dan bukan diluar negeri. Teman-teman dosen saya menyesalkan keputusan ini. Kata mereka kenapa orang seperti saya justru berorientasi studi S3 di dalam negeri, padahal sangat potensial untuk belajar di luar negeri. Memang pada tahun 1998 saya pernah melamar untuk studi ke Australia namun ditolak di SETNEG karena umur telah melewati batas minimum. Di UM saya belajar banyak hal baru yang ternyata mempunyai daya tarik serta keunggulan tersendiri. Dan saya percaya bahwa institusi bukan satu-satunya factor yang menentukan keberhasilan seseorang, melainkan orangnya.Kita sendiri adalah bukti konkretnya. Meski hanya tamat dari Kupang yang secara nasional dianggap “udik” katakanlah begitu, dalam dau pendapat dan dalam hal bernalar saya kira tidak kalah dengan mereka-mereka-mereka yang tamat dari universitas terkenal di Jawa. Dasar pendidikan kita di SMA dulu itulah yang telah meletakkan dasar intelektual yang sangat kokoh. Sehingga dimana saja kita berada kita selalu percaya diri, percaya akan kemampuan mengatasi pelbagai persoalan pelik yang tengah dihadapi kapan dan dimana saja.

Middle

Adik yang baik,

Ada dua hal yang membuat saya menulis surat ini. Yang pertama menyangkut studi saya. Apakah orang seperti saya bisa mendapat bantuan finansial dari sumber lain mengingat besarnya beasiswa saya kurang memadai, yaitu 700 ribu rupiah perbulan sudah termasuk dipotong 15% pajak lagi. Jadi kalau ada kemungkinan pemda bisa Bantu saya, tentu saya sangat berterima kasih. Tolong informasikan. Nanti saya akan telpon ke rumah jabatan kira-kira seminggu dari sekarang sesudah surat ini dibaca. Jadi tidak perlu dibalas. Yang kedua, ini agak berat, tapi saya tidak ingin mengecewakan adik perempuan saya. Adik perempuan saya akan mengikuti ujian untuk menjadi guru Taman Kanak-kanak di xxxx. Namanya xxxxxxxxxxxxx dengan nomor ujian: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx. Dia merengek-rengek kepada saya untuk menghubungi adik agar membantu kelulusannya. Pertama saya memang sangat berkeberatan. Mengenai yang terakhir ini, kalau tidak memungkinkan untuk dibantu, lupakanlah. Saya tahu ini bertentanga dengan semangat reformasi, namun saya melakukannya hanya untuk tidak mengecewakan dia. Maklumlah dia sudah menganggur kurang lebih 10 tahun. Sebenarnya dia sangat mampu, hanya formasi untuk guru TK selalu sangat amat terbatas dibandingkan dengan guru SD. Bahkan di xxxx formasi guru TK hampir tidak pernah ada selama sekian tahun. Sekali lagi Adik XXX jangan merasa terbebani dengan permintaan yang terakhir saya ini. Syukur kalau ada peluang. Namun atas semua upaya saya ucapkan banyak terima kasih.

Closing

Saya doakan semoga Adik berdua selalu tabah menghadapi segala macam bentuk kemampuan intelektual adik serta di dampingi seorang istri yang faithful, friendly, sociable serta merakyat ditambah dengan ketekunan dan kedekatan selalu kepada Yang Mahakuasa maka segala persoalan baik politik dan social akan dapat diselesaikan denga baik.

 

English Translation:

Opening

[I am the oldest student among the seven classmates in my class. During the first month of my study, I frequently got a headache. I am sure this was due to the fact that it was very long time I did not either read books or write scientific articles. So, when I have to make presentations and get many readings everyday, it really makes me get the headache. Paramex (i.e. a brand name of Indonesian medicine for headache) becomes my friend and I bring it wherever I go. Let me tell you that recently I got hospitalized for a week at Lavalette Hospital. I got head-scanning there and the doctor said I was not in serious illness like tumour or other deadly disease. Since I did not use my health insurance, the payment for the hospital reached almost a million rupiah (the scanning itself cost 650 thousand rupiah). Because of this serious headache, once I was thinking to quit my study. Fortunately, I have very kind professors who encouraged me. In addition, now I get used to eat medicinal herb, and I get its effect.

I never regret to pursue my doctorate degree in a local university, instead of studying abroad. Many of my colleagues felt sorry to hear that I have studied in a local university for my Ph.D. They said why a person like me chose to pursue my Ph.D. degree in a local university. They see that I am potential to be a student of an international university. In fact, it was in 1998 that I decided to get my Ph.D in Australia but I didn’t get permission from the SETNEG (State Secretariat) because I did not meet the requirement for age to continue that study. I was too old to get an oversea scholarship. In State University of Malang (UM) I get many new things to learn which makes me come to believe that institutional factor is not determinate in an individual’s success, but I think the individual himself is the key to his success. We proved it, I guess. Look, we, who were the alumni of a high school in an extremely remote area in our country, are now becoming individuals who can solve any complicated problems whenever and wherever we are.

Middle

My beloved Brother,

I am writing this letter for two purposes. First, it concerns with my study. Is there an opportunity to get financial helps from other sources for people like me? In fact, in this program I have already got a scholarship from the government in which I earn 700 thousand rupiah per month subject to 15 % tax. If there is a possibility that the local government can help me, I would express my great thanks to you. Please let me know if there is such possibility. I will call you approximately a week from now after you read this letter. So, I think there is no need for you to answer my letter. Secondly, and I think this will be a bit hard for you to decide, but I will not make my younger sister disappointed. She has just got an entrance exam for kindergarten teacher recruitment. Her name is XXX, and her test number is XXXX. She insisted me to call you for help to pass the exam. Actually I do not want to do that, but she has been jobless for more than 10 years. In fact she is able to do the exam, but I think the limited space for position of the kindergarten teacher in this area might cause her failure in this recruitment. Moreover, in this region, the recruitment of kindergarten teachers has not been established for many years. Again, I don’t want to give you more burdens by this request, but I would be happy if there is the possibility for that. I know that recently the spirit of reformation still fulfills the political atmosphere in our country. Finally I have to express my gratitude.

Closing

May God bless you and your wife, and give you patience in coping with various kinds of problems. With your intellectual capability and the supports of your faithful, friendly, as well as sociable wife, I think you can solve any problems you have.]

Another example of the deviation can be recognized by reading Excerpt CL-2 below. As if influenced by the way he expresses his Indonesian letter discussed previously, CL in this moment writes the English letter with a very long introduction section as well. If we look at the first three paragraphs of this letter, evidently CL tries to talk things which would not be exactly related to what he wants to say as his intention. In fact, he expresses his intention in the fifth paragraph, which explicitly requests a help to find more references for his study. We can have a careful look at this sentence quoted from the fifth paragraph: “Regarding this, I would like to ask you a favor to find me journals, or articles or book-chapters related to ethnographic study…”. This letter really brings CL to the systematized deviation of making some of his introduction sections.

Excerpt CL-2:

Opening

Let me first introduce myself before saying what I am going to say. My Name is xxxxxxxxxxxx and, like you, I am a MAT-19 alumnus, around 1987/1988. I should begin my letter with this introduction because I believe by now you must have forgotten me. It is reasonable for you to do so, for we haven’t written to or seen each other since summer 1988. But I always follow you from our alumni contact magazine, what you are doing and where you are going year to year.

In this second instance, I would like to congratulate you, firstly for your academic achievement (having got Ph.D), secondly, for your professional standing as a faculty member in our alma mater, and last but not the least for your marriage. I expect that you tell me something about all those but tell me more about the last I can’t help waiting!

Now I am no longer a teacher, but a student. I have been studying for a Ph.D in State University of Malang (SUM), since last fall (year 2001). SUM is one of the leading universities in Indonesia and is located in the city of Malang. Malang is the second largest city in East Java, three hours by plane from Kupang, my hometown. The area has an excellent weather almost like that of late spring or early fall in Vermont. (Oh, how I miss the beautiful fall around our campus). As you see, I am still excited to study again even though I am not ‘young’ anymore. I felt a little distressed in the beginning, though. You know physically I am not as strong and energetic as I used to especially in coping with excessive amount of reading and writing tasks. In Malang, I live by myself away from the rest of my family. Now I am beginning to get along well with this new life style as well as the surroundings. Back home in Kupang, my first son is now a senior in Civil Engineering, my daughter (second child) is a twelve grader and is going to be a freshman this coming fall (she likes to study Japanese language); the sweet youngest (a boy) will be at grade ten.

After our departure in summer 1988, I went to Freeport in Maine to home stay with the Marstallers family for a month. After that I headed to Laurence, Massachusetts, to teach EFL in Laurence International Institute for two months. When fall started I decided to return to SIT in order to once again experience the beauty of the colorful foliage – probably for the last time – wile writing up my final project. In December 18, 1988, I submitted my final project to the school and flew back home the following day via Boston.

As a matter of fact, until now I have two other international experiences; one was when I took a short course on ELT (English Language Training) Management in Leeds University, UK (September – December 1993) and the other was the teaching of Indonesian as a foreign language in Northern Territory University in Darwin, Australia, from 1995 –1998. In the mean time while lecturing at the teacher training institution, I also gained a reputation as an ELT center manager in my university, and as a teacher of Indonesian language to foreign learners either domestically or internationally. All these busy types of jobs had so much occupied my time and thoughts that I kept postponing my plan for study. In year 2000, however, my decision to study for Ph.D. was firm and started working on it. And I was happy I was successful in making my plan accomplished eventually.

Middle

My research interest is ethnography and the title of prospective dissertation would be “A Portrait of a Successful EFL-teacher”. Regarding this, I would like to ask you a favor to find me journals, or articles or book-chapters related to ethnographic study or my research title. I still haven’t got any literature explaining about the set-up criteria being a successful EFL teacher. The fact that, books or research resources about ethnography and teacher professional development are very limited in our libraries and this forces me to request helps from potential friends abroad. And I have picked you as one of my potential resourceful persons without asking you first. Sorry! However, if anything of my request has caused you some sort of inconvenience, I must say I do apologize, and hope that you ignore it. Even so, after all these years of parting, I think, as one best friend of mine, I still know you very well (heart and mind) and I am convinced that you will not turn away my request. If you know recent addresses of some of our gangs, it would be appreciative to share them with me, so that I can write them.

Closing

I know that there have been a lot of changes at the school nowadays and I must admit that there are also “sophisticated” achievements on the domains of educational programs as well as the faculty. I will appreciate if you can share all the changes and achievements with me in the future. Please remember me to all my ex-teachers, some of whom, I believe, are now already professors, especially Diana, Donald, Alex, Claire, Jack (is he still at SIT?), Patrick, Lisa and Elizabeth. Shame on me, that I don’t remember my linguistics teacher’s name. As far as teaching is concerned, she is an eccentric type of person and I shouldn’t forget her name. In addition, I know one of the ESL teachers and his name is Chuck. He used to be my teacher at ESL program of SIT. He is a great teacher and I like him very much. If he is still around, tell him that I send a big Hello. I’d also like to give my regards to your husband and family. I think I am closing this letter now, and am really looking forward to hearing from you soon.

There is a feature of contexts in the excerpt CL-1 and CL-2 which can be considered as something in common: asking a request to the reader. The other features are different, for instance, while in excerpt CL-1, CL writes the letter in Indonesian and for his Indonesian reader, excerpt CL-2 is written in English for his overseas friend. In addition, the status of the relationship between the writer and reader in both letters is evidently the same, i.e. formal relation. Of the former the formal status emerges because of his brother who is governor, while of the latter the formal status is due to their overseas friend whom he rarely met. This condition influences his strategies in developing the openings in his letters.

Unlike YA, in developing his introduction sections, CL inserts his own voice regardless whether he is facing an Indonesian or overseas readers. These negotiation strategies are evidently caused by the fact that the contents of the letters both intend to seek helps. He is actually compelled to adopt the peculiar strategies to make openings due to the nature of the content (field). We can see how CL develops his middle and closing paragraphs of both Indonesian and English letters in line with Western convention which are employing linear fashion (see the discussion of middle and closing paragraphs below).

Different from YA in a way of making the main content of the letter, CL tends to write his middle paragraphs in linear way with no other variation. He constantly expresses claims as he develops every middle paragraph in his letters. Evidently, these two examples of middle paragraphs quoted from excerpt CL-1 and CL-2 show how CL develop them in linear way, a manner of developing paragraph which is in line with the Anglo-Saxon convention of writing. First, excerpt CL-1 shows us that two purposes initiate CL to write the letter, i.e. asking the possibility of the government to give financial help, and a request of making his sister passed the entrance exam in the government office recruitment. Then CL constantly develops these two claims by supporting them with related illustration and proof. Secondly, CL explicitly requests his reader to find him journals, or articles or book-chapters related to his research to be (see the middle paragraph of excerpt CL-1 and CL-2).

The presence of the closing paragraphs in CL’s letters indicates that it was similarly found no different variation in both kinds of letters. CL tends to write the typical closing paragraph which is relatively brief containing the conclusion of what he explains in the middle paragraphs. The following two quoted from Excerpt CL-1 and Excerpt CL-2 are exemplified this typical of closing paragraphs. In excerpt CL-2, CL makes a conclusion section of his letter by mentioning some of names whom they have ever been friends. Appreciation of friendship is stated in addition to telling some other conditions. Unlike making the concluding remarks of excerpt CL-2, CL concludes her letter of excerpt CL-1 by mentioning prayer for his reader’s family (see the closing paragraph of excerpt CL-2 and CL-1).

2. B. Idea Development in the Letters

In terms of being well-organized or ill-organized, CL makes all his letters well-organized. None are found as ill-organized paragraphs in both Indonesian and English letters. Excerpt CL-8 exemplifies the typical of paragraph organization in CL’s letter.

Quotation from Excerpt  CL-8:

Menyimak pengalaman kepemimpinan Kaka selama ini saya dapat menyimpulkan satu hal, yaitu bahwa kepemimpinan itu tidak hanya sebuah ilmu, tetapi juga sebuah seni. Sebagai ilmu dia melibatkan analisis, sentesis dan evaluasi untuk keperluan sebuah kebijakan; sedangkan sebagai seni dia memerlukan kreasi-kreasi imaginative agar dapat memberikan kepuasan batin baik bagi pembuat maupun bagi penerima kebijakan itu. Pengalaman kepemimpinan Kaka yang begitu komprehensif, dari amatan kami, setiap kali terjadi mutasi senantiasa meninggalkan penyesalan dan ketidakpuasan pada institusi yang ditinggalkannya, bukan karena jeleknya kepemimpinan Kaka, melainkan dan terutama karena sebaliknya, yaitu prestasi kerja yang amat mengesankan. Disini telah terbukti bagaimana Kaka telah berhasil membangun sebuah kepemimpinan yang menggabungkan ilmu dan seni. Bapa Ten (Om dokter Husen), ketika kembali dari misi perdamaiannya di Ruteng tempo hari, bercerita kepada kami ketika kumpul-kumpul di toko barunya Rolus di kawasan Oebobo, antara lain mengatakan: “di Ruteng situasinya tenang-tenang saja…banyak orang yang saya temui, puas dengan Bupati…jadi sebenarnya, Bapa Dewi itu….kita tidak usah ragu. Kita disini saja yang anggap seolah-olah Ruteng sudah mau runtuh…Bapa dewi sudah mau dipecat dari Bupati…padahal dimana-mana orang puji. Yaaa…tentu saja ada yang tidak suka. Mereka itu yang berkoar-koar di Koran dan omong macam-macam”. Berita ini melegakan, lagi menyejukkan hati saya dan Ani. Saya ucapkan selamat dan Bravo.

 

English Translation:

[On the basis of your leadership experience so far I concluded one thing, i.e. leadership is not only a science, but also an art. As a science, it includes analysis, synthesis, as well as evaluation needed for a policy; while as an art, it needs imaginative creation to satisfy the policy consumers. During your comprehensive leadership experience, whenever you move to a new position, there must be some individuals of your staff in your former place who felt dissatisfied. This is, I think, not due to your failure in your leadership, but, in contrast, it proves that you are successful in combining the perspectives of science and art in your leadership in the former place. When Bapa Ten (I mean uncle Dr. Husen) got back from his journey for peace mission in Ruteng, he told us a sort of information in his new store in Rolus, somewhere in Oebobo area. He said, “the situation in Ruteng is conducive, I met many people there; they said that they were satisfied with your leadership in this region. So, Bapa Dewi! Don’t be skeptic. It is only people in this neighborhood who assumed that Ruteng is about to collapse and you are supposed to resign. Meanwhile you are praised by everyone in other areas. Yeah. of course, there are some people who like your leadership while some other do not; and those who do not like your leadership speak up the bad thing in the media.” This information makes Ani and me relieved. Congratulation my Brother, and Bravo!]

The paragraph above has both the principle of organization and smooth-flowing sentences. The content of the paragraph is devoted to the writer’s statement about a leadership. In illustrating his statement, the writer cited an example of his older brother’s leadership in his region. First, he declared his claims in the two statements mentioned in his first as well as second sentences. Those statements are sequentially “Menyimak pengalaman kepemimpinan Kaka selama ini saya dapat menyimpulkan satu hal, yaitu bahwa kepemimpinan itu tidak hanya sebuah ilmu, tetapi juga sebuah seni” (Translation: On the basis of your leadership experience so far I can conclude one thing, i.e. leadership is not only science, but also an art.); and “Sebagai ilmu dia melibatkan analisis, sentesis dan evaluasi untuk keperluan sebuah kebijakan; sedangkan sebagai seni dia memerlukan kreasi-kreasi imaginative agar dapat memberikan kepuasan batin baik bagi pembuat maupun bagi penerima kebijakan itu” (English Translation: As a science, it includes analysis, synthesis, as well as evaluation needed for a policy; while as an art, it needs imaginative creation to satisfy the policy consumers). Next, he illustrated his claims by mentioning examples related to them in the rest of the paragraph. Thus, the rest of the sentences were totally served as supporting sentences, that is to say exemplifying some activities and issues with which the mentioned leader has already been concerned and people’s comments about his leadership. Apparently, this paragraph meets the characteristics of one of organization principles, i.e. exemplification.

Moreover, the quoted paragraph above follows not only the requirements of having logical arrangement, but also those of having smooth flow. To make his ideas easy to follow, he used expressions such as yaitu, sedangkan, sebagai, melainkan, terutama, antara lain (English Translation: namely, meanwhile, as, but also, especially, among other things), and made combining sentences, like “Sebagai ilmu dia melibatkan analisis, sentesis dan evaluasi untuk keperluan sebuah kebijakan; sedangkan sebagai seni dia memerlukan kreasi-kreasi imaginative agar dapat memberikan kepuasan batin baik bagi pembuat maupun bagi penerima kebijakan itu (English Translation: As a science, it includes analysis, synthesis, as well as evaluation needed for a policy; while as an art, it needs imaginative creation to satisfy the policy consumers). In this case, he bridged two ideas: (1) leadership as a science and (2) leadership as an art.

DISCUSSION

Thought Patterns of Bi/Multilingual Writers

This study, which features the case of Indonesian-English Bilinguals writing letters in the two languages, illustrates another episode in the broader context of writing practices and experiences of bi/multilingual persons in a less academic writing genre. From the current study, three issues were addressed pertaining to the bi/multilingual thought patterns.

First, how the participants systematically organize their ideas into a tripartite structure with its distinctive variations is presumably influenced by the thought patterns of two cultures, i.e. Indonesian and Anglo-Saxon cultures. The thought patterns rooted from the Indonesian culture – i.e. oriental culture in Kaplan’s (1980) classification – apparently follows non-linear fashion of thought. As a matter of fact, the participants are Indonesian native speakers. Therefore, it is quite obvious that they are under strong influence of the non-linear fashion, i.e. the logic of Indonesian culture. At the same time, the participants are proficient English speakers, who are also lecturers and students majoring in English Education. In fact, learning and teaching English (i.e. schooling and previous writing experience background) implies being influenced by the Anglo-Saxon, the logic of the western culture in which linear fashion of thought is the characteristic. Accordingly, Platonic-Aristotelian thought fashion (i.e. linear thought pattern) strongly influences those individuals. Having been bilinguals for a relatively long period of time, these individuals have their cultural “in-betweenness” (Bhabha, 1994), which enables them to shuttle (Canagarajah, 2006) between two logic of cultures. These “in-between” thought patterns seem to be constant no matter what languages they use to write the letters. However, only when they write letters to different persons or in different contexts, they might use different ways of expressing their ideas, not because of the changing thought, but rather it is a matter of meta-cognitive competence to realize who the interlocutors are and in what context they are writing, leading them to negotiate their fashion of thought in the two contexts of cultures, i.e. English and Indonesian. In short, their negotiation strategies occur in the level of mode because they are facing different readers (tenor), or because they are conveying different nature of topics (field).

Second issue that would be important to address is the distinctive rhetoric of expressing messages in the letter. In order to develop distinctive categories of strategies bilingual writers may employ to express ideas to their recipients, I may classify the following rhetoric of expressing ideas and their distinctive characteristics as drawn from in both English and Indonesian letters:

1. Rhetoric of making a request. When the writer is requesting something to the recipients, he expressed it by ‘turning and turning in a widening gyre’ (Kaplan, 1980). The circles or gyres turn round the subject and show it from a variety of tangential views, but the main intention can be seen at end. Letters expressing ideas in this manner were written in purpose of strengthening social bond as well as of transacting information.
2. Rhetoric of giving information. It is a matter of ordering which comes first and next in stating the facts. Usually the most important facts come first and then the facts of secondary importance, next those of tertiary importance, and presumably the least important facts come last. Letters which employed this manner ended with purpose of having more information-transaction rather than social interaction.
3. Rhetoric of making social chat. Unification of emotional and intellectual components is emphasized, but the selection and organization of the materials in order to achieve the desired purpose are indispensable. The end letters with this manner is more social bond strengthening than information-transaction.

Linguistically, each rhetoric above has different language use; it is more paradigmatic (Bruner, 1986), or referential (Sapir, 1961), or transactional (Britton, 1970) in the first two rhetoric used by the participants, while in the rhetoric of making social chat, the language used is more expressive (Britton, 1970; Sapir, 1961), or more narrative (Bruner, 1986). However, no matter written either in English or Indonesian, the letters did not deviate from the three rhetoric of expressing ideas above. This implies that context, audience, and situation are quite influential in these negotiation strategies of rhetoric instead of languages. Obviously, negotiation with two fashions of thought occurred in all three rhetoric of expressing ideas above. This suggests that the negotiation strategies occur in the level of mode under the influence of field (content).

The final issue is about repertoire of mode options which are represented by different sub-genres of letter writing that bilingual writers may employ to express their ideas. Two sub-genres of letter writing are developed: (1) email-letters and (2) postal letters (i.e. either handwritten-mailed letters or typewritten-mailed letters). These mode options quite presumably influence how the participants expressed their ideas in the letter. In the email-letters, the writers tended to express their ideas more briefly, and more interactive, being direct to the point they wanted to convey. It led to the development of a hybrid genre that combines features of both written and oral discourse. This happened due to the fact that in this format the writers were aware of the readers’ shorter attention span; besides, the writers had shorter time of revision, planning, or peer reviewing because they usually read the letter on screen and then print it before sending it to the readers. The postal letter has other characteristics such as relatively long letter, incorporating more complex and multiple subjects to talk. The writers of this letter format had more time to revise, plan, and peer review the letter before they sent them to the readers. Thought patterns, in this case, are presumably influenced by such different formats since these differences in formats inevitably brought about different contexts which led the writers to shuttle their thought patterns. After all, it is worth noting that such format-utilizing aspect in the letter should be highlighted as one of the determining factors for the writers to make “rhetorical switch” of their thought patterns. This implies that negotiation strategies occur in the level of mode under the influence of mode per se.

PEDAGOGICAL IMPLICATION

Viewing bi/multilingual writing from the perspectives in the Negotiation Model proposed by Canagarajah (2006) seems promising in the pedagogical issue of second language writing. Bi/multilingual writing should not be perceived in a static manner, but more on the movement of the writer between languages. This implies that pedagogical possibilities of genre-based teaching (Hyland, 2007) in the classroom application become skeptical. Genre-based teaching can only be transferred to the writing classroom application if genre is perceived as something static. It would be not effective to put a flexible entity into the teaching area since change and reshaping toward genre could be repeatedly made by individual users. Dynamic, fluid and blurred character of genre (Freedman and Adam, 2000) underlies this argument. Instead of looking at the genre-teaching possibilities in the second language writing classroom, strategies of communication (Canagarajah, 2006) should be opted as a new orientation in second language writing class. More practically, this means that, first, strict rules and conventions of  writing should not be imposed to students. Rather, they should be led to sharpening their rhetorical negotiation for achieving meanings and functions. They have to be given knowledge of different rhetorical strategies, i.e. that in the writing of their L1 and that in the writing of English. To know both strategies of writing in L1 and English makes the students more aware of the two rhetorical strategies. Consequently, rules and convention of English writing should not be used as the standardized norm for teaching writing to the students. However, in the writing process, students should be completely aware of their audience. In other words, students’ audience awareness should be taken into consideration from the very beginning of the writing process (Canagarajah, 2002).

Secondly, since writing is not only the product for descriptions of writing competence, but also the process of composing in multiple languages, the writers’ versatility and their attempts to change the context of communication should be accommodated in the second language writing classroom. Thirdly, different thought patterns possessed by bi/multilingual learners should be perceived as their repertoire which led them to shuttle creatively between discourses to achieve their communicative objectives. In this perspective, it is asserted that the writers should be treated as agents, who would shuttle creatively between discourses to achieve their communicative objectives.

REFERENCES